Is a wife wrong to be angry at her husband?
Good morning Aunt Lisa:
I was wondering if you could help post on your blog or respond to me personally
Hope your family is great. Firstly, I want to thank you for this opportunity to reach out to you via this means. I have this little problem that won’t make me sleep well. please I need your advise on this one.
My name is Bekky (you may change the name for privacy concern) and I have been married for four years now. I don’t know…but is it wrong for me to be angry at something that upsets me?
Anytime I have a slight fracas with my hubby and it has to do with money or something else and i get angry, it becomes a problem. I will try to very detailed by using an instance that recently happened.
I’m a stay-home mum but I freelance for a living. I have known my husband for 10 years. During the period we dated, he supported financially even though I never asked for a dime. But then, anytime we had a misunderstanding, he was quick to calling me a gold-digger and this used to hurt that i almost quit the relationship because using that term was so demeaning and insulting. Before we wedded, I made sure to end the part of him calling me gold-digger by asking him to stop rendering help to me.
We are married now and things are really cool with us but for this one part. I was jobless for a long while but because i didn’t want the gold-digger name to resurface, i maintained my lane and i’m that contented and i’m a sucker for living an independent life. I took on freelancing and it’s been really cool. I just started freelancing full time barely a month ago and every dime i made, i used in offsetting some debts. So, hubby complained that i don’t use cream and it’s not good for his public image that “people will be talking” and i was like “do i really care about what people say?” I’m not looking hungry and so i don’t have to be a slay mama. i’m not kidding but i look 18 when in fact i’m 9 years older. The issue is this: It’s not as if i don’t like to rub cream and do fine or i don’t know how to buy cloth and be slaying but I have more pressing issues.
I’m really lucky not be bother about those things because my in-laws are super nice. Now, i have other things to bother about. My skin is extra sensitive so i’m tired of jumping from cream to cream and thank goodness, i have a dark skin. So, as i was saying, i have a younger sister in school who is my responsibility. I have parents too who are looking up to me, so i cant’t go and buy buy beauty cream when I have a sister who hasn’t eating or my mum who’s waiting on me.
He asked why i don’t rub cream and i responded that i don’t have money yet for the one i like. He asked for the name and i said i had no idea that it’s an organic product and once I have the money, I will get it. Hubby got angry that i don’t care about his public image and i really don’t understand why i will be worried about people’s opinion of me. I do my best not to complain of whatever he gives for the upkeep. This year has seen the worst of prices in the market and i have never complained or asked for more. I told him that i didn’t want to bother him with my issues and that I won’t be happy if someone calls me a gold digger. he got angry asking me who gave me the right to be angry? He said: ” I’m your husband. You have no right to say that i’m insulting you. Do you know the insults i receive at work”?
I’m quite confused. Was I really wrong to be angry or to express my concerns on how I feel? How can i navigate through this one? I don’t understand why I should be like an an employee.
PS: Please i will appreciate constructive criticisms from the married. no cursing please.
