Dear Aunty Lisa,

My boyfriend is sexually selfish and I think it stems from boredom. He doesn’t want sex as often as he used to at first and it has become a routine.

He responds to my advances, but then becomes quite passive. Last night he allowed me to give him an endless massage then endless pleasuring. I had a happy ending too (eventually), but what I wanted was intercourse.

He hates to talk about sex, but I hate waiting around for him to do his thing in bed. It’s almost as if he wants me to play hard to get, but I really don’t know how to be convincing.

I discovered during a couple of holidays (when he wants sex frequently) that if I demand a little bit of role play and alternating it with a night where he gets to be totally self-centred, he’s more interested in sex.

The trouble is, we’re not having sex often enough for me to be relaxed about it. So, in summary, I want more sex and more kissing and touching from him.

And I need to know how to play hard to get within a relationship when all I want to do is get down to it. Please help.

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