My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for more than a year now. However, in May he had a fling with a girl from work.

Although he tried to hide it from me, I eventually found out and we broke up.

But after a couple of months of pestering me for forgiveness, I decided to take him back and, to be honest, he has been amazing ever since.

He is incredibly caring and is always telling me how much I mean to him, and he loves to show me off to his friends. He also accepts that what he did was wrong.

Despite this, I have a huge dilemma because I think I have fallen in love with one of my work colleagues.

We have been very good friends for a while, but recently I can’t stop thinking about him and I miss him terribly when I’m
not with him.

To make things even more complicated, he recently told me that he really likes me and would do anything for me.

I’m finding it hard to understand whether I feel this way because I have lost faith in my current relationship because of my boyfriend’s cheating or whether I actually do love my friend. I’m afraid of making the wrong decision, and I’m also worried about hurting other people’s feelings.

Aunty Lisa says

I think it’s possible that you’ve taken your boyfriend back with lots of good intentions about working through it and moving on, but deep down you’ve realised it’s not going to work.

Despite all the effort he’s putting in to make it right, the trust has obviously gone.

I’m not suggesting you leave him and jump straight into another relationship, but I think you need to be honest with him about how you feel – that you thought it could work, but now you’re having doubts.

Only time will tell whether we make the right choices in these situations, but your gut instinct is usually a pretty good guide.

You could have a relationship with your friend at work and then realise he’s not the one either.

But what I think you must do is have a proper separation from your boyfriend and spend some time on your own to clear your head.

You don’t feel 100{863ae21f3883e951777bdbc8607717246c41fed58c5a71d477243a35f9718ce7} about the relationship or you wouldn’t be thinking of anyone else in a romantic sense.

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