“I was engaged to my boyfriend at the age of 20 years. I prayed to God that if it was not His will for me to be married to that guy then I must not be married to him. After two years of dating me, he married another lady and I was not angry about it.  “In 1998 I got involved with a guy I met at church. After a short while I noticed that there was another girl in his life and I stopped seeing him.
“In 2003 I met another guy through another Christian movement and unfortunately he married another girl. Although I was hurt, I hid my feelings from him and bought him a present and attended the wedding. We still attend the movement together and I have no intention of quitting it.  “I am a lady aged 35 and I sometimes feel ashamed of being single at my age. I don’t have anybody to cuddle and no proposals from men my age. But I do get proposals from young guys or married men who just want to go to bed.” – Lillian, e-mail
Dear Lillian
I am so sorry to hear about your misfortunes – this is a very difficult situation for anyone. You are not the only one going through this. There are more women than men in the world, so some will get married and some will stay single.  Happiness is not about having a man in your life. You can create your own happiness by working yourself up and having fun with friends. Try other places to meet new friends – you seem to concentrate on finding a potential partner in the church environment. Go to church for Christian reasons and don’t hope to find the man of your dreams there. If it happens, it will be because it was meant to be. Some women believe that going to church will bring them better prospects of marriage. It doesn’t work that way.  You prayed before to God to not allow you to marry a man if he was not meant for you. Do the same now and ask God to show you that there is a man meant for you. Think of marriage as any other girl does, but do not be desperate. This might affect your chances of going down the aisle.
I suggest that you put the thought of marriage aside and go out with friends. Have fun while you are young. I assure you that somewhere along the way you will meet the man of your dreams, a man who will love and cherish you.

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